this is my blog where i only put all my sadness in.
when im happy i dont blog. simple as can be. im not a sad fuck by the way.
i miss you i miss you i miss you.
if i said i do, you wont give two shits.
sometimes i just make things up so i can see you.
from afar atleast. i miss you A. :(
its nice to know that youre happy with somebody.
but to tell you the truth, im hurting to be happy for you.
have i forsaken you oh dear blog? :)
well my enlistment’s in 10days time.
i dont think im physically and mentally ready though.
and for that. starting for today. i’ll be starting a routine.
20 pushups. 50 sit ups. and a timed 2.4km run.
you put that on repeat.
and i’ll have do pushups and situps whenever i can.
gotta be ready. ready to strike.
for i will be a guardsmen. :P
i kinda feel empty inside now. but i cant do anything about it.
fuck it. lets roll.
i can only be happy for you,
if i am sad, im only being selfish.
:)
dear anonymous,
i dont have all the riches on the world, i dont have the power for expenditure.
i cant buy you diamonds, i cant buy you pearls.
dear anonymous,
i dont have the looks of the finest men, i dont have the flawless features.
i cant be a model, i cant be your steward.
dear anonymous,
i dont have the strength of hercules, i dont have the bravery of leonidas.
i cant always protect you, i cant always shield you.
dear anonymous,
i dont have the best of hearts, it goes silly when you smile.
dear anonymous,
cant you see, i have nothing. im everything short of glamourous.
but, all i have,
is this frail heart, its confidence decimated.
i can only afford to give you my heart, my support and my unquestioned love.
and if come one day, you think that is all you ever really need.
you know, where to find me. you know i will always be there. you know i know.
2 years ago. you broke my heart.
10years from now, i reckon it’ll be the same outcome.
but i fucking miss you.
your lips against his, oil and water.
a sword against my heart.
Date of Enlistment: 10th July 2009.
3rd Battalion Singapore Guards.
Ready to Strike.
tell me im naive, but im suddenly excited for NS and i want to be the best soldier. :)
I know youre not asleep
I can feel you moving over there
Youve been playing with the seam
In your worn out underwear
My lips are raw as hell
From biting on them just to stay awake
Its not like Im gonna need them, you wont be around
To see them bleed and break
Chorus:
All that I do, comes back to you
So Ill just think about you
til theres nothing in my head
All I can do, is try not to screw this up again
And just be friends, Id rather be dead
I drove out of east atlanta
With a headache the size of my car
I called to say I was okay anyway
cause I know how you are
Im like a movie without an ending
You know Ive got nowhere to go
And it makes me wanna throw up
To see you wanna give up
More than youll ever know
(chorus)
Bridge:
Everythings supposed to have a happy ending
But the record keeps skipping and the needle keeps bending
Like the road Im driving to the bridge that has no end
I wanna take back everything that Ive broken
But the bridges behind me are burning and smokin
I guess this is the end
(chorus)
im not giving up. never and always will. i will be te rock i promised to be.
exciting events lie ahead. and im excited and happy.
but i would be complete, only if you were around. if only.
a simple hope, a simple wish. a dreadful heart, a happy smile. my heart staggers as you come to mind. thanks for the memories. i chase after the sun, holding on to the clouds as leverage. is this what im look for? i counted em clouds. i met cloud nine.
But my pieced-again heart, shackled, bounded. as if im afraid to let it out again. again, if i risk it all out. bleah.
good judgement comes from experience,
experience comes from bad judgement.
i make mistakes, therefore i learn,
you were the mistake, that i’ll forever yearn.
